A guy, tonight, talked about how for years and years, he had relationships with women, but then at age 22 or something, he met this gay guy. The only apearnt gay guy in his town of 3,500. And they've been together for the three years since.

Despite all my efforts, I feel that I'm still really rather biphobic. Or at least not biphillic. Which is weird, because in some strange way I think I'm attracted to bi guys. But I think because, It's the ultimate way to thumb my nose at the system. In a sense I can look at all the soccer moms driving around Ford Expeditions, with their white picket fences, and their 2.5 children and say, look here chica. I'm in love with, married to, this guy, who you so had a chance at and guess what. He chose me.

I'm a wierd one, I know. In some strange way, I live to be able to thumb my nose at the world, try it some time. Its really quite satisfying.

Somehow that made me extremely happy. And I'm not sure if that's a good thing, but for the moment it just is.

Anne Lamont writes these books about her childhood, which wasn't perfect, not by a long stretch. And kind of similarly, her life wasn't smooth. And it provides her with a lot of just really wonderful material. And I joked this week, about how as someone with a fairly sane together life, I don't have that kind of material source. David Sedaris has a lot of the same kind of material. Anyway, I was complaining about this artistic disadvantage, and someone said to me. You could write these stories about how much it sucks to be all together and stuff. (Ok, so he was a little more coherent, but still you get the drift).

To which I said. "Could there be anything more trite." I have friends who already complain about how contrived and pompous I can be, but whatever, I can't let that cloud my view too much.

But then he suggested satire, in a way I hadn't thought of. And It has some potential, but I need to develop it a bit. Also one thing I need to do, is focus a little more closely on social commentary, because that's what I think my strength is.

In anycase, I think this entry is going to mark a new age in TealArtistry.

Ya see, the forever problem with TealArt, is Chris and I reflexively sensor ourselves. It's sick. I mean, some degree of censoring is good, but it's almost to a point where we're getting bland and it doesn't work out. So I'm going to try and lighten things up a bit. So I'm going to start talking about gay stuff now. And not just complaining about how the movement isn't really a movement, and how social justice stuff is so frustrating.