The Sexual Self: The Construction of Sexual Scripts by Michael Kimmel.
My old advisor sent me a link to this book, which was touching, and it's nice because the book is spot on and I totally want to read it. Also, I like how Kimmel, who was someone who I read a lot back in the day is doing things that are really interesting to me.
Anyway. Father, if you're reading this, since you have academic library privileges....